Tuesday 30 June 2015

Lazarus Rising Chapter 10: part 2 (parental advisory)

Dear Gentle Readers, be careful. This chapter of the novel contains graphic violence. Enjoy!



Quickly and quietly the two men made their way down the gentle slope. Every now and then they would stop and lie still against the ground, their dark green uniforms proved to be excellent camouflage in these conditions.

Once they were sure they were not being watched, they would continue. They finally reached the bottom of the slope and Robert could see Albert and Alf just beyond the tents and looking back up the slope he could see Paddy and Brian.
The four French men were still sitting by the fire. They were speaking in their own language and even though Robert only knew enough to understand that they were talking about the boredom of sentry duty.

He almost felt sorry for them, they all looked to be young, raw recruits and he knew that very soon they would regret joining Bonaparte's army.  He gave the prearranged signal and he and Jimmy began to move slowly and silently into the French camp. As they moved Albert and Alf also started their approach. They were hidden by the French tents so they would not be seen but they had to move quietly over the rocky terrain.

Suddenly and without warning one of the soldiers stood up and in a loud voice made a crude comment about needing to piss. His colleagues laughed and one of them pointed roughly towards Robert's position. Robert dropped to the ground and took the only cover he could behind a large green shrub. Jimmy ducked back behind a large rock. Robert was horrified that the man was walking directly towards his position and was unbuttoning his trousers as he approached.

The Frenchman's cock was already in his hand when he stopped walking and he sent an amber stream through the air and to Robert's disgust  his jacket got sprayed. With a single thrust of his blade upward he stabbed the man through his balls and up into his abdomen. He jumped up quickly to muffle the mans cries. He held the man upright and used him to hide himself from the other French soldiers.

He could feel the the arterial blood pouring down onto his hand that still held his sword. He looked into the mans eyes and saw that he was still alive. His eyes showed a strange  mix of emotions, shock, fear and despair yes but also a profound sense of embarrassment. Robert took pity on him. He pulled his sword from the man and in one swift motion used it to cut his throat, ending his suffering quickly and quietly. He then signalled to the others to attack. Alf and Albert moved first and they were on the three remaining soldiers in the blink of an eye. Two of them died without even having a chance to draw their swords and the third had started to open his mouth to shout an alert to his sleeping comrades. No sound came though because Jimmy's bayonet had been shoved through the back of his neck severing his vocal chords and the carotid artery. The point of the bayonet was protruding from the mans mouth and the light from the campfire made it glint with a golden shine. As Jimmy pulled his bayonet out from the mans head, blood poured from the mans mouth along with a bubbly gargle. 

The four British comrades quickly and without fuss advanced towards the tents. The initial encounter with the French had only lasted about two minutes. There were two tents, both large and grey in colour. They once again split into two groups and they stood on either side of the front flaps. Robert cleared his throat and in the best French voice he could muster he said "Les soldats, se levant et nous aident.'

Groans came from within and an angry voice complained about being woken. A head came poking out of the tent and a sword came flashing down that caught the man squarely on the back of his head cutting deep into the skull, killing him instantly. His body fell to the ground with a quiet thud and his brains leaked onto the stony ground.

As Jimmy wiped the blood from his blade, Robert pulled back the tent flap to reveal it was empty. He nodded to Albert who also used his more basic French to lure any Frenchmen within to their doom. The two men who appeared were quickly dispatched as they stepped from the tent. Finally the men could relax and Robert waved to Paddy and Brian to come down.

"Well done guys" Robert said with a smile on his face.
"Oy Albie" said Jimmy.
"What?"
"Can you smell French piss?"
"Yeah, yeah' said Robert and the men all laughed.
"Get some rest while we can. The other guys will be doing their bit. We need to be ready to move. Brian, keep an eye out just in case.'

The young man moved away and took up position at the centre of the camp. Robert and the other men went into the tents to get a well earned rest.     







 

Monday 29 June 2015

Dobrý deň , moji priatelia slovenské

 

Hello Gentle readers, especially those of you from the beautiful country of Slovakia. Today I had my first Slovakian visitors so welcome to you.

Vitajte!
  
 
                  Bratislava
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 

Today in History 29th June

Hey Gentle Reader, its time to board our de Lorean, crank it up to 88mph and generate the 1.21 gigawatts required to get BACK TO THE FUTURE!

http://24.media.tumblr.com/48d7e22321513d5ae67516fc2153b23c/tumblr_mlvwtbPHFe1r7emqio1_500.gif 

1613: The Globe Theatre, where Shakespeare's plays among others were first performed, burns to the ground.
 https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/6f/Hollar_Long_View_detail.png 

1974: Riga born ballet dancer, Mikhael Baryshnikov, defects from the USSR to Canada. 
http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4ede62e2eab8eac47600004c-400/image.jpghttp://www.rankopedia.com/CandidatePix/20051.gif 

1975: Steve Wozniak tests the Apple 1 computer for the first time.

 


2007: The Apple iphone is launched.


http://assets.nydailynews.com/polopoly_fs/1.1175743!/img/httpImage/image.jpg_gen/derivatives/gallery_1200/steve-jobs-iphone-2007.jpg 

2014: The Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL or ISIS) declares its caliphate in Syria and Northern Iraq.

http://freethoughtblogs.com/taslima/files/2014/09/Bthkf75CQAAit8H.jpg-large.jpg 

#Globetheatre #williamshakespeare #mikhaelbaryshnikov #stevewozniak #stevejobs #apple1 #iphone #isis
 

Sunday 28 June 2015

Lazarus Rising: Chapter 10 (Part 1)

Yes Gentle Reader, chapters of my novel are like buses. You wait ages for one to come along then two come along at once.



Chapter 10

The small group of men quietly made their way up the bank. When they reached the top of the incline, Robert held up a hand to indicate that he wanted them to stop. It was still dark although to the east, the first signs of the rising sun had started to brighten the horizon.
Robert had no concerns about the sunrise however, it was the fact that he and his men, who he was responsible for, were walking into the unknown. The Lieutenant had been very vague about what to expect and the men had been nervous, especially the two youngest.
Robert had taken Brian and Paddy aside and told them what to expect. He explained that their roles would be to hang back and use their sharp shooting skills to pick off any enemy  soldiers who would appear once Robert and the three other members of the unit engaged the enemy.
Albert, Jimmy and Alf were all excellent skirmishers and their close quarters combat with bayonet, sword or knife was incredible. Robert himself had superior hand to hand combat skills as well as being an excellent shot.
The young corporal peered over the crest of the small hill they had just climbed up and looked down into the small bowl shaped hollow. True to the Lieutenant's predictions a pair of French guns had been placed there and they were pointed, rather ominously, right at them. Robert knew that these guns' range could severely impact Sir Arthur Wellesly's plan and it was important that they were put out of commission before dawn. He scanned for French troops and he saw 4 men sitting around a camp fire. They were wearing the blue uniforms of French gunners and they also wore swords on their belts. He also saw three large tents beyond the guns and he guessed that the four men were on guard duty while the others slept.
He had no doubt in his men's ability to deal with the four men quickly and quietly but the tents meant their could be another ten men who could appear at any time. He gestured to Alf and the veteran slipped quietly over to his side.
"Alf, I don’t like this situation, but we have our orders. I want you and Albert to make your way down so you are behind the tents. Stay quiet and stay alert. When you hear my signal, you may have to act fast."
"What's the signal?"
"Me and Jimmy helping the Frogs reach paradise of course."
"Ah well" Alf mused, "I don’t think we will miss that."
"Good man. Head around the ridge and when you're in position, Jimmy and I will make our move."
"Good luck Robbie."
"You too."
"Come on Alby, lets go."
The two men slipped away into the gloom and Robert turned to the two youngsters.
"Paddy, Brian, Jimmy and I are going to give the Frogs a little wake up call. Paddy, you head up there." He pointed to a large outcrop of rock about 15 metres to their right.
"Brian, stay here. Its vital that you two keep your eyes open. If it looks like we are going to be outgunned, we need you two to cover us. Only fire though if you absolutely have to.'
Both men nodded their understanding. The whole troop knew that just a single shot could alert the other French troops in the area and the carefully planned covert operation wouldn't be very covert any more.
"OK Jimmy, feeling lucky?
"Well, my mother always said I would come to a sticky end corporal."
He unsheathed his knife which was sharp with an 8 inch blade. Robert knew that Jimmy would occasionally talk to the knife and he was glad that the London boy was on his side.
"Mary and me are going to be quiet" Jimmy said as he ran his fingers along the blade.
"I don’t know about the French Jimmy, but you scare seven shades of shit out of me. Lets go.'




Saturday 27 June 2015

Lazarus Rising: Chapter 9

Hey Gentle Reader, its been a while but here it is. Chapter 9 of my novel. Enjoy!!


Chapter 9.

The church was emptying slowly. Lazarus could hear the comments from the men and women around him.
"He hasn't changed a bit." one said.
'Still so handsome" said another.
"Its a tragedy what happened" agreed a third.

Even the Metcalf's were talking about Robert Foxworth's miraculous return to Stelling Minnis.
"He hasn't aged a day" the doctor said in an envious way.
"Very handsome man" his wife agreed.
"Who is he?" asked Samuel.
"Well" started his father, "Its a long story."
"Please father?" begged the boy.
"Well, lets see if I can remember.* The doctor seemed to be accessing hidden memories, closing his eyes to focus on events that had happened a long time ago. Even Lazarus was listening intently because he wanted to know more about the family.

"Charles Foxworth married Abigail Bainbridge in 1787; she was the only daughter of the local squire and lord of the manor. A few months after they had wed, her father died in a hunting accident, fell off his horse and got trampled poor fellow. I was only a boy at the time.
Well Charles, as husband, inherited the lot. The luckiest man in the world he was. He made his fortune through slavery and then overnight became a land owner and Lord of the manor."

They had reached the doctor's house and as the family were preparing to enter Lazarus pulled the octor to one side. He was feeling confused about what he had seen and heard and the feeling of uneasiness that he had felt in the church had returned.

"I'm sorry doctor" he said, "Do you mind if I take a walk and clear my head?'
"Of course my friend, why don't you go and explore the village."
"Mr Lazarus", Samuel interrupted, "Can I show you around, like we talked about earlier?'
"Of course you can, I would be very happy if you did that, thank you."
"Come on then, what are we waiting for?"
"Easy now Samuel", his mother scolded him, "Remember Mr Lazarus is still recovering."
"Its fine Mrs Metcalf" Lazarus said, "Come on Sam, show me everything."

_____________________________________

The boy led him by the hand and they headed up the hill which Samuel told him would be the perfect place to start their adventure. It wasn't that steep or very high but the view was good and Lazarus could see the whole village.
So Samuel, where are we?" he asked.
"This is Maxwell hill, there used to be a windmill here but it burned down a few years ago."
He gazed down onto the village.
"There is my house" he pointed and smiled. "Theres the church and my school and you can see the green and everything. I love coming up here, especially on nice summer days like this one."
"That's the Foxworth house down there isn't it?" Lazarus asked quietly.
"Yes."
"If you dont mind Samuel, I want to go down there. You dont need to come with me, but I have to go and see it for myself."
"I dont understand Mr Lazarus."
"Since I came to Stelling Minnis, I cant stop thinking about it and because my memory is still foggy, I need to know why or I may go mad. Do you understand now?"
"I think so" the boy replied, "By finding out about the house, you will find out about yourself."
"Thats right. Thank you Sam, but I shall find my own way down. This is something I need to do alone."
"Alright Mr Lazarus, I shall go and find my friends, see you later."
With that the boy turned and ran down the hill with the energy and enthusiasm of youth. Lazarus watched him go and smiled to himself.
He took a deep breath and strode down the hill towards the big house in the woods.

____________________________________

When he reached the foot of the hill he suddenly realized that there was no direct path to the house from his position and he decided to walk through the woods.
Although not big the forest was tightly packed and inside the canopy overheard had blocked out almost all the sunlight. The trees were old and gnarled and the air was very still.
Tree roots threatened to trip him with each step he took and rogue branches snagged him and tore his shirt. Another one hit him in the face and gave him a painful scratch on his cheek.
After what seemed like an age he stepped from the trees and found himself on the edge of what seemed to be the edge of a large ornamental garden. He looked around and saw that this garden had not been cared for in a long time. Plants were growing out of control and weeds covered the paths and patios. Hedges that had been carefully grown and sculpted were now messy and overgrown.

He realized that no one was about and that no one had stepped on this ground for a very long time. He walked slowly through the maze of paths that ran throughout the garden. He instinctively knew the shortest route towards the house although he had no recollection of being here before.

He turned into a more open area of the garden and there in the centre was a large ornamental pond. It was kidney shaped and at the centre was a marble statue of a woman holding a baby.
The sight made Lazarus shake with fear and he nearly stumbled. He remembered something; something bad, but he couldn't remember details, just feelings. A feeling of nausea was rising in his throat and sweat was beading his face in his panicked state.
He wanted to run but his legs had turned to jelly and he stumbled and fell onto his knees. He reached out with one arm and grabbed the marble edge of the pond and dragged himself up so that he was gazing down into the dark, grimy water.
His reflection looked back at him and seemed to laugh at his distress.
"What's the matter Lazarus?" the reflection mocked, "Feeling guilty?"
"Who am I?" he asked the reflection.
"No, no my friend. Its much more fun watching you suffer. You will discover your identity, but only when the time is right."

The reflection seemed to laugh at him again and Lazarus tried to grab at the face in the water but all he did was break the surface with a splash that drenched him in the smelly, dank water.






Friday 26 June 2015

14 days to go



Hey Gentle Readers, just a reminder that in 2 weeks time. I am going to be a married Scotsman in Riga.

Lena is beautiful, Lena is kind, Lena is sweet, Lena is strong.

She is my Angel Princess and I am her Hunny Bunny.
 



#angelprincess #hunnybunny

Thursday 25 June 2015

OMG! OMG! OMG!

Hey Gentle readers. I know as a man I should not get all excited about things like pots and pans, but just take a look at these beauties.




This is Lena and mines wedding present to ourselves. They are so pretty and I cant wait to use them.

Today in History 25th June

Dear Gentle Reader, after a few days relaxation its time once again to brave the winds of time and the storms of history.

 
1876: The Battle of Little Bighorn, known by the victorious Lakota Indians as the Battle of the Greasy Grass, takes place. General George Custer was killed in the battle.
 
 
1903: George Orwell, the British author of 1984 and Animal Farm is born.
 
 
1932: Peter Blake, the artist who designed the cover for the Beatles' album Sergeant Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band is born.

 

1940: France surrenders to Nazi Germany.



1947: The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank is published for the first time.



1961: Ricky Gervais, UK comedian and creator of The Office, Extras and Derek is born. Click on the link to see a classic scene.



2009: Michael Jackson, the King of Pop, dies due to an accidental overdose.



#battleoflittlebighorn #francesurrenders annefrank #georgeorwell #peterblake #rickygervais #michaeljackson #june25

Wednesday 24 June 2015

Liepaja

Hello gentle reader. For the last couple of days Lena and I have been visiting her mum in Liepaja. For those of you who dont know Latvia, Liepaja is in the south west of the country not far from the border with Lithuania.

Liepaja is a small city very different to Riga but it does have a lot of friendly people, gorgeous buildings and a history all of its own. It is a sea side town and every summer it hosts a great many tourists who enjoy the warm hospitality and the warm sunshine and beautiful beaches.


Part of the resson for visiting was I was going to meet Lena's dad Aldis. Today was the big day and when he called to say he had arrived my heart skipped a beat. I know it sounds silly but Lena told me that her dad had never met any of her previous boyfriends and I was a little bit nervous to say the least.

The first two places he took us to were graveyards to see his mum and dads graves. Then we headed out into the woods and I must admit I was hearing "Dueling Banjos" from the movie Deliverence. Luckily he was just taking us to see his land where he and his brother are growing fruit and vegetables.



We headed back to town and Aldis took us on a cool guided tour of the town. 
We saw the Soviet beach defences that sre all falling down, a wind turbine that was turning so fast it was making a whoosh whoosh noise that was a little scary. We saw wave boarders and a beautiful old cathedral and when he dropped us of at home he gave us a beautiful set of bedding as a wedding present. 

My worries were unfounded and I am glad. My future father in law is a nice guy.













Monday 22 June 2015

Just call me Stuart, Kevin or Bob.

I have a dream Gentle Reader....

I want to be a Minion.....

But Lena wont let me.


#minions 

Back in a few....Have a good Jani

Hey gentle reader, I'm out of Riga for a few days, Going to Liepaja for Jani.

I will be thinking of you all and come back with new ideas to share.

If you live in Latvia,

 Priecigus Ligo Svetkus

Sunday 21 June 2015

Top 10 Fun Facts about........Cats

Hey Gentle Reader, I love my little pussy, Danny, so here are some facts about our feline friends.
 
1. A group of cats is called a clowder.
 
 
2. Pope Innocent VIII said that cats were evil and thousands were burnt.
This led to an explosion in the r population ad a worsening of the black death
 
3. In Ancient Egypt, if a family pet cat died, the owners would mourn by shaving their eyebrows.
 
 
Angelina and Nicholas Cage....browless
 
4. The Catt-flap was invented by Sir Isaac Newton.
 
 
5. The heavies cat ever was Himmy from Australia who weighed 21kg.
 
 
 
6. In Scotland, a statue was built to honour a cat called Towser, who caught 30,000 mice.
 
 
7. 4 million cats are eaten in Asia every year.
 
 
8. There are approximately half a billion cats on planet earth.
 
 
9. The first cloned pet was a cat called Little Nicky. He cost $50,000 to make.
 
 
10. The world's rarest coffee, Kopi Luwak, comes from beans that have passed through
the digestive tract of an Indonesian wildcat. It costs $5000 for 450g.
 
 
#cats #boxofkittens #clowder #innocentviii #isaacnewton #himmythecat #towser #kopiluwak

WTF 1

Every now and then Gentle Reader, I come across a news story  that makes me say "What the F***!"

http://thecantinacrew.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/dude-wtf21.jpg

I thought that this would make quite a good trend for the blog so welcome to WTF!

Kanye West, the US rapper who has in the past has compared himself to Picasso, Shakespeare and even Jesus, has now compared himself to Leonardo da Vinci.

 

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/76/6e/06/766e06f73289243a387299b98810aa76.jpg   http://therecordingrevolution.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/da-vinci-profile.jpg
His comparison is because, like da Vinci, he cannot be easily categorized. Leonardo was an artist, engineer, adventurer and thinker.

West thinks he defies description. I can think of a few words to  describe him but as my mummy says "If you cant say something nice, say nothing."

Obviously he is not universally admired. 130,000 people have signed a petition saying he should not be allowed to headline the Glastonbury Festival.

http://cdn.glastonburyfestivals.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/v13.jpg 

#WTF #KANYEWEST #LEONARDODVINCI #GLASTONBURY2015